being special
Going through old notebooks, I came across the following I wrote a few years ago:
If people really got me, they’d love me. If they really loved me, they’d get me.
Man oh man, was this phrase the backbone of all the romantic pining in my life over the past 14 years! That immense desire to be gotten, to be appreciated as someone special. Most of my life, my self worth has hinged upon being special. However, ever since I recognized this a few years ago, its grip has weakened.